‘If Only,’ Bridgerton Star Oli Higginson on Finding Himself Through Modern Oli—by Amanda Moses

British actor Oli Higginson had been cultivating his musical alter ego, Modern Oli, long before landing his breakout role on Netflix’s Bridgerton.

The rising star tells Visual Tales that his passion for the arts runs as deep as his earliest memories. He recalls writing his first song at just 12 years old while attending boarding school in London. Though still a pre-teen, he already possessed an old soul, finding solace in plays and musicals. His love for theater, poetry, and literature wasn’t shared by the boys around him, which he described as “quite feral.” They didn’t understand his fascination with the stage, and because he preferred performing to playing football, he became a target for bullying.

It was during that period of isolation and misunderstanding that Higginson wrote his first song: something he still has nestled in a box from an old tape recorder.

“I remember the first song, and it’s still in my head. I was about 12 or 13 when I wrote it. It’s not very good, but I could probably still sing some of it,” he said. “It was called ‘If Only,’ and it was inspired by being bullied at the time. It was about being a young guy who liked music, theater, and art, and wishing I had something in common with the people around me so they wouldn’t treat me so badly.”

Higginson’s songwriting, even as an adolescent, was deeply introspective, grappling with philosophy and life’s larger questions. Something even into young adulthood, others didn’t understand. 

“There are lots of deep things in that,” he said. “I was always interested in the big questions, philosophy, Greek mythology, and deep academic thought. I think I was probably trying to be really poetic and profound.”

Those introspective tendencies eventually gave birth to Modern Oli, a moniker inspired by his affinity for postmodern art, the movement that emerged after World War II and challenged the simplicity and elitism of modernism. It was a name that traced back to his early twenties during a drama school exercise.

“I remember saying that I felt like the postmodern version of myself,” he recalled. “I felt like there was a before and an after in my life. I had left home, moved to drama school, and become an adult.”

When it came time to release music, he knew he didn’t want to do so under his own name.

“The first thing I came up with was actually Post Modern Oli because I was curious about this version of myself that existed after childhood, after things became more complicated and nuanced. I wanted a space where I could explore that through music.”

“Post Modern Oli felt like too much of a mouthful,” he added with a laugh. “Modern Oli just felt right.”

While songwriting became a cathartic release for the thoughts swirling through his mind, theater was his tangible outlet, paving the way for him to become a classically trained actor. He was even scouted after performing in a school play, launching him toward a career in entertainment. Yet Higginson dislikes labels and resists being defined solely as an actor or musician.

“I wanted to be taken seriously as an actor, as a proper, classically trained actor, and that’s still what I am,” he said. “But labels feel so outdated now. I just want to create what I enjoy and make the things that excite and scare me. Actor, musician, writer, songwriter, storyteller, it all falls under the same thing. What I’m passionate about is exploring stories through different mediums and not feeling restricted.”

Growing up in London proved to be a blessing because art surrounded him in every form. He could visit The Strand to see plays, and living in a city that gave birth to Shakespeare only fueled his desire to perform.

“I grew up in London, which meant I could go and see a lot of plays,” he said. “I would often see an actor on stage and then watch them in a TV show or film. The actors I connected with most were often people who had cut their teeth in theater and gone to drama school.”

Others recognized his talent early on, and he signed with a prominent London agent at just 17. Yet Higginson believes entering the industry so young may have caused him to skip some essential stages of artistic development, an experience that ultimately inspired his latest single, “PEOPLE PLEASER.”

“Despite having the opportunity to go straight into the business, it was important for me to go to drama school and train,” he said. “I wanted to become better and more equipped. Drama school is so exhaustive that you come out the other end feeling like you can do anything. I’m so glad I made that decision. It always felt like the authentic choice for me.”

Last month, Higginson returned to New York City with the bold, genre-bending single “PEOPLE PLEASER.” He shared with Visual Tales that it was one of the first songs he had written that wasn’t about love, but rather his early experiences in the entertainment industry and his desire to satisfy everyone around him.

“I think actors and performers are inherently people pleasers,” he said. “If you didn’t have a desire to entertain in some way, it would be an odd career choice. We’re hungry for validation, acceptance, and love, often from complete strangers.”

“That song is a reflection on some of the darker places that appetite can lead you,” he added. “It can stop you from listening to your own needs and wants. It definitely began with my relationship to acting, but it extends into my personal life, friendships, and relationships as well.”

With the release of four songs this year, “Transatlantic,” “One of Those Faces,” “People Pleaser,” and “Don’t Let Me Love You,” alongside a recurring role on Bridgerton and appearances across HBO, Amazon Prime, Netflix, Sky Atlantic, and the BBC, Higginson says he wants to pursue both passions equally. To him, acting and music exist in constant conversation, each nourishing the other.

“They feed into each other,” he said. “Every day is different. I fall in and out of love with both of them all the time. These industries are complicated. It’s one thing being an actor in drama school or writing songs in your bedroom; it’s another thing making it your career.”

“I think I’m a better actor because of the music I’m making, and I’m definitely a better musician because of the acting I’ve done and continue to do. I want to try the impossible task of running them side by side for the rest of my life,” he added. 

After performing a sold-out show at Pianos on Manhattan’s Lower East Side on May 15, he’s still deciding what comes next. Still energized by the crowd’s enthusiasm, something he says New York City always brings through its celebration of individuality, he simply wants to keep creating, whether that’s an album, an EP, or something entirely different.

One song, however, has resonated with him lately: “American Complex.”

“Right now, I’m really enjoying a song called ‘American Complex,’ which I’ve been opening my shows with,” he said. “There’s a transatlantic theme running through this collection of songs, and ‘American Complex’ has this expansive, almost Electric Light Orchestra and Jarvis Cocker vibe to it. It’s a little more rebellious than some of my other songs and feels like the headspace I’m in right now, the chaotic, mad headspace of traveling around the world and living out of hotel rooms.”

Nothing, however, compares to hearing that his music has resonated with someone else. When fans tell him that his songs have brought them comfort, it fills him with indescribable joy.

“As a teenager, I’d put my headphones on and listen to Thom Yorke and feel seen and heard,” he said. “The privilege of even remotely becoming that for someone else completely defines why I enjoy doing this.”

Thinking back to the bullied pre-teen who felt no one understood him, he never imagined his songs would connect with people in such a personal way.

“Anyone who comes up to me after a show and says they’ve connected to my music still shocks me. It’s beautiful, and I’m incredibly grateful for it. It keeps me going,” he said.